You Can Ask....

I read quite a fair amount of blogs and it's not uncommon for the man in a FLR or husband in a wife-led marriage to struggle with balancing the "waiting for the wife to take the initiative" and "asking/hinting, whatever for sexual favors" that he wants. Lets face it, even guys who are in a committed wife led marriage have needs and wants.

This morning was one of those times. I was horny. There, I said it. Big suprise, a horny guy...LOL So as to not pressure my wife too much, I asked if I could arouse myself outside the bathroom/master closet door while she got dressed. I figured this way, she would have me gawking at her and feel like she should "do something sexual."

She said no, I want to watch you in here. While arousing myself as she applied her makeup she said:

"It is OK for you to ask for what you want.....it's my decision to give it to you or not."

Ah, the essence of a wife-led marriage. My only concern is that she will allow me too much. I'll bring this up to her and let you all know what she says.

Two Things

First. Last night we had some friends over for dinner. They don't formally know of our wife-led marriage but I suspect they have some idea. The husband and I always joke about asking our wives if we can play golf, checking with them about dinner plans, etc. The dinner we had was in part due to their anniversary. In my own little way, I furthered my own personal agenda of couples accepting a wife led marriage. I served him coffee in a mug that said "Yes Dear" on it. I joked that he gets this mug because he's figured out the key to a successful marriage. Also at the end of dinner, I very quietly looked at my wife and asked her if it was OK to clear the dishes. She said yes. The funny thing is that I didn't "pre-plan" that question, it just came naturally from our wife-led marriage. And I"m absolutely sure that the other wife heard it.

Second. In my last post, I discussed that my wife didn't feel wifely if she teased me, got me "hard and frustrated" and then just stopped and went to work, got dressed, whatever. We changed the phrase from 'hard and frustrated" to "turned on". I told her that a guy likes to be turned on by his wife and I suspect that most wives like to know they can still turn on their husbands. The actual orgasm is secondary. Well, this morning she told me to drop and start mastubating. Gladly. She then asked me what I had done for her lately and what still need to be done. As I got closer, she told me to stop. I thanked her for turning me on and in a later phone call, told her that I hoped to get enough done so that she would turn me on again. I think she is starting to understand the difference between being a bitchy, cock teasing, denying, unplayful, sex denying wife and a loving wife who is learning that turning on her husband brings them closer together.

Please Read

I don't nomally post about the deep meanings and reasons for a wife led marriage. Saturday night my wife asked why I blog and I said to let others know that a wife led marriage can and is one way to have a wonderful, "normal" marriage.

But that isn't why I want you to read this post.

This morning my wife was rushing out to work and she...gasp....wiped off her own boots:) They were a bit dusty from a summer on the shelf. A few minutes after she left, she called and asked me if I was offended by her wiping her own boots. She said that had I done it, probably on my knees, I'd get excited but she didn't have time to engage me. She was worried that I'd get frustrated if she walked out the door.

Here's the thing: She said that had I gotten all worked up and frustrated she would have felt like a terrible wife, leaving me there. By not "playing" with me, she would have felt bad.

I always say that I like to be hard and furstrated. She has a very difficult time with the frustration part.

So I told her to forget about it. We discussed looking at it from a different perspective. I told her that I get turned on. Period. That I get turned on when told to do things, when I clean her shoes, do her laundry, etc. etc. I conveyed to her that I feel closer to her through this type of interaction. Hell, it envigorates me to clean the house.

I understand she wants to feel like a good wife. It's one of the things I love about her. I think she now understands that getting her husband excited (with or without an orgasm) is a good thing.

I guess, as hard as I've tried, I never seen the "he's frustrated, I'm not being a good wife" aspect from her point of view.

For the men, talk to your wife and tell her that you get emotional and marital satisfaction from her when she is the "boss". Tell her that, in general, there isn't a connection between your orgasms and her being a good wife.

For the wives, many husbands want and need and truly enjoy a wife led marriage. Many want to be turned on and get turned on doing things for you. Forget the words tease, forget the words denial and frustration. I'm sure that you want to turn on your husband. If you are like my wife, you feel better about being a wife when you turn on your husband. So turn him on. Don't worry about his orgasm.

National Bosses Day

Oh crap, it was YESTERDAY. How do I know, because my wife called me to let me know I missed it.

For all you lucky guys out there in a wife-led marriage, a quick run for flowers may be in order.

Sweating Plus 5

Please see previous post.

An update. I've retreived her suitcase from the car, emptied it, ran her laundry, made her brunch, served her coffee and a few other tasks she's requested. I've jumped through her "hoops" and other than her actually being demanding, nothing overtly sexual. And that's OK. (It probably didn't help that the furnace guy was here.)

Anyway, more later.

Sweating My Ass Off

Wife gets back into town in about 1 1/2 hours. I too was away all weekend and have been busting my butt getting the house ready for her return. Laundry, kitchen, dusting, vaccumming, down on my knees wiping the hardwood floors.

What if anything will happen? I must accept that she will most likely be tired and not interested in anything sexual. And that's OK. (See last post, I'm still buzzing from one week ago.)

I'll enjoy her company and the fact that she will notice how nice the house looks. Now I must go and shower and if I'm really quick, a run out to get some fresh flowers.

This is my life. It's real.

Is That The Best You've Got?

Yesterday was crazy hectic in our household. Pre-travel planning and packing for my wife and me. Kids going in every direction. Emergency trip to the cobbler for lacrosse equipment repair. You get the picture.

As things started to settle down last night my wife told me that "You can serve me the decaf that I had to make." A not so suble jab. It's one of our "things." I always make the coffee and decaf. But since I was getting home well after her she made it.

And as normal, I brought it to her in her "It's good to be Queen" mug while she lounged (much deserved) in her very cushy leather chair. It's her chair too. She doesn't like anyone else to sit in it. Even guests have picked up on this. As I handed it to her she looked me straight in the eyes and said,

"Is That The Best You've Got?"

(instant woody:)

"No," I said.

Then I immediately got onto my knees and presented her coffee to her.

A slight nod of the head meant I was dismissed.

For any ladies out there I think I speak for most guys.....That is all it takes to get our motors running. I was so happy that I stayed up till midnight folding laundry and making sure everything she needs was washed and ready for her trip.

Thanks

Thanks for picking me up at the airport.
Thanks for pulling into the gas station and saying "Welcome home." My cue to fill up your car.
Thanks for leaving the kitchen a mess and expecting me to clean it after a day of traveling.
Thanks for holding out your foot with the "look" that says remove my boots.
Thanks for telling me my mini vacation was over.
Thanks for cleaning the boxers that say "Wife Worshipper" on them.
Thanks for making me wear those boxers.
Thanks for making me get very, very hard and frustrated then get into bed...without an orgasm.
Thanks for placing your foot in my crotch an hour later, waking me up, and getting me very,
very hard again.
Thanks for making me ache and throb....shaking with lust and love.
Thanks for teasing me nearly to death :)
Thanks for snapping your fingers another hour later and having me sleep next to you on the
floor.
Thanks for not letting me cum last night.
Thanks for having me serve you coffee this morning.
Thanks for letting me get naked while kneeling on the floor this morning and finally cumming.

And most importantly, thanks for putting forth the effort to keep our marriage fun, sexy and connected.