Submissive or Not?
I hate that word: Submissive. Sounds like I'm a sissy. Weak. Not a man. Of course, since this is my blog and this is one of my many issues please don't be offended. If you think you are submissive fine.
I hate that word.
Another reason, and probably the main one, is that if my wife and I were to tell, oh, anyone, about our wife led marriage and told them that I was "submissive" I believe they'd automatically think that I was submissive in all other aspects of my life too.
And what's funny is that I don't care who knows that we are in a wife-led marriage. I don't want them thinking I"m submissive.
If I'm at all submissive, it is to my wife and my wife only.
I often wonder if I'd be "submissive" or even in a wife-led marriage if I was to divorce and remarry. I honestly don't know.
Here is what I do know. Being in a wife-led marriage is great......for us. It works. It provides a framework, primarily sexual, for us to work within. And we are both happy.
posted by whatevershesays @ 8:16 AM
6 comments
6 Comments:
Hi, I agree with you. I don't like the word submissive either, it has too many bad connotations. I to am only "submissive" to my wife.
I tend to say obedient or cooperative when speaking to my wife or when describing my behavior. I think she likes those words better as do I.
She is embracing LFA slowly but steadily. Partially because like most women I don't think she misunderstood the true nature of being submissive to one's wife. She has totally embraced her sexual authority in our relationship. Perhaps one day she will understand how spanking can deepen our relationship.
I wouldn't get to hung up on a word, I don't mind calling myself submissive because to me it means that I am prepared to submit myself to the control of my wife. I wouldn't describe myself as submissive in everyday life or to any other women, but if my wife exposed me to one of her female friends as her "obedient husband", it wouldn't bother me, and I may even enjoy having another female know that I am submissive to my wife.
I agree and don't agree with "at all times..." I don't really care about the word submissive but often wives, especially wives new to wife led marriages do care. Whether we like it or not words are powerful and are often misunderstood or have connotations associated to them. When easing my wife into a possible WLM I wasn't careful enough with the words I choose. Over time I chose "easier to swallow" words or words that didn't sound as harsh and she was much more accepting of the idea. She now uses those words herself.
Thanks for the great blog!
I think it is a shame that it is a word that so many judge so unfairly.
I understand the dictionary term of the word, but living with a strong proud individual, that is submissive to you because he loves you that deeply, changes everything.
Destiny
I am submissive to my wife because she is a woman, and therefore generally to all women, too. She's the only one to slap me when I'm wrong. But I mind if another woman slapped me if I misbehave? No, there are all Goddesses. It's a matter of principle, a religious feeling.
"No, there are all Goddesses. It's a matter of principle, a religious feeling."
Great expression. Over years i had trouble to express my feelings in case of the relation between women and men. I had a hard time finding my role as a 'man'.
Now i find myself being submissive to my girlfriends needs and to the needs of women in general. The interesting thing is: i never felt such a total control of myself because it seems that i found my destination. And in addition i never felt so manly like in these days. This new approach to relationship is bringing out the 'best-possible-me', love this. Why i'am convinced of this?? -Inner thoughts and views are conform to outer behaviour. This is what makes it feel so real and honest to me.
best wishes,
mike.
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